A demure young lady getting ready to board a flight from Ireland asks the priest standing beside her in the queue: "Father, may I ask a favour?"
"Of course, child. What may I do for you?" he says kindly.
"Well, I bought an expensive woman's electronic hair dryer for my mother's birthday that is unopened and well over the customs limits, and I'm afraid they'll confiscate it. Is there any way you could carry it through customs for me? Under your robes perhaps?" she asks.
"I would love to help you, my dear, but I must warn you: I will not lie," he says firmly.
"With your honest face, Father, no-one will question you," she replies.
When they get to customs, she stands aside and lets the priest go ahead of her. The official asks: "Father, do you have anything to declare?"
"From the top of my head down to my waist, I have nothing to declare," says the priest.
The official finds this answer rather strange, so he asks: "And what do you have to declare from your waist to the floor?"
"I have a marvellous instrument designed to be used on a woman, but which is, to date, unused."
Roaring with laughter, the official says: "Go ahead, Father. Next!"